Go-Plates and Ranch Sauce

I’ve waited tables for a long time, and I’ve tried to identify key phrases that hint at what type of tip to expect from a table. It’s not an exact science–there have been exceptions in every case–but there are a few that tend to push me off of the “tip cliff.”


“Ranch Sauce”


As in, “Can I get some extra ranch sauce for my fries?” If ranch sauce is requested for a steak, all bets are off.

“Very Well Done”


If the table actually uses the term “hockey puck” to describe how they want their beef, it’s not good.

“You did a great job!”


The verbal tip is a solitary creature.

“What if she shows you her…”


No, free products are not exchanged for that sort of thing.

“Go-Plate” and “Go-Cup”


When used to refer to to-go boxes and cups.*

*One shining exception was the table that wanted a “go-plate for the chili cheese fries” because they “got a cat that just loves chili cheese fries–the bitch just loves ’em.”

They were very generous.

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